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Retro Review – The Goonies (1985)

by Andrew Abernethy on April 19, 2019
Contents
  • Overview
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In case you’ve lived under a rock the past 34 years, The Goonies is a movie focusing on a group of friends who live in the Goondocks area of Astoria, Oregon.  All of their houses are being foreclosed on, and it’s implied that it’s all for the Astoria Country Club to expand and build a golf course.  Local legend has it that a pirate named One-Eyed Willy was trapped inside a cave nearby with his ship, The Inferno, loaded with treasure.  The kids find a map dating back to 1637 that they believe will lead them to Willy’s ship and then be able to save their houses.  What follows is a trek through the bowels of the town, complete with run-ins with a criminal family, booby traps, puzzles and challenges, and the obligatory chance to give up partway through before a motivational speech.

Click here to view the trailer!

The movie features some young talent that went on to varying levels of success in acting.  The actors who play the two brothers went on to land roles of Samwise Gamgee in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy and of Thanos in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  The movie was directed by the accomplished Richard Donner, perhaps best known for directing Superman with Christopher Reeves, and was written and produced by Steven Spielberg.  The movie features some interesting filming elements, such as the brief introductions to most characters during the opening car chase.  This helps give you a sense of each character before most of them even have a line of dialogue. 

I remember watching this movie as a kid, and I think it will always have a place in my heart.  It seems to have become cool with some people to point out how a group of kids on the cusp of puberty and a few older teenagers are searching for One-Eyed Willie (a reference to male genitalia), but I feel the film has still retained my nostalgic love for the most part. 

Now, does the movie hold up?  In some ways yes, and in other ways no.  If you sit back and turn off the critical part of your brain, I still think it’s a fun movie.  If you watch it with a critical eye though, there are a few idiosyncrasies.  Why is the younger brother seemingly more responsible than the older brother who was left in charge when they decide to raid the attic?  How are the plumbing areas under the Country Club connected to passages under the restaurant and to the local wishing well?  Why does the wishing well have water falls inside the well and apparently heated water (you can see it steaming in the movie)?  Does no one actually notice the word “dynamite” on the side of some of the candles that are found?  Why does the dynamite not come up ever later in the movie after making a point of showing the audience?  Again, little nitpicks, but if you let them, they will pull you out of the movie.

There are some deleted scenes, including one that is referenced at the end of the movie when the kids talk about fighting a giant octopus, but there is not a director’s cut of the movie.  Apparently, some of these scenes did make it into some broadcast versions of the movie, but never in a home media release.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen them.

If you’ve not seen the movie, go watch it.  If you have pre-teen kids, go watch it with them, even if you have seen it.  This movie lets the kids go on the type of adventures that every kid imagines as being possible in their hometown.  I mean, who didn’t want to go on a treasure hunt?

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About the Author
Andrew Abernethy

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Retro Review – 12 Angry Men (1957)

by Andrew Abernethy on April 26, 2019
For this Retro Review, we go way back to the age of black and white movies. I first saw this movie my senior year of high school. My AP Calculus teacher didn’t feel like teaching one day, so she played this movie for us (and no, she didn’t help much with my calculus knowledge.) 12 […]
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  • Amy McCracken
    April 19, 2019 at 8:20 am

    The Goonies is one of my favorite movies. Even now if #TheGoonies is on TV I’ll stop whatever I’m doing and watch it. After reading this review I know I’m going to watch it today or this weekend for sure.

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